Life is about learning to make hard choices when we only have partial information and are unable to see into the future. We may fear repeating past mistakes because of choices that did not turn out so well. We may have grown up believing that we had poor judgment and could not be trusted with important decisions. We may have an innate desire to stay low and keep our head down to avoid those who would criticize us. We may want something so badly that we are afraid to mess it up with a bad choice. Or we may not want to be bothered with hard stuff. We would rather find the path of least resistance and get through our days with as little trouble as possible. Unfortunately, those hard choices keep showing up anyway!
Our soul is an important player in our decision-making. The soul includes both emotions and the will to act. These emotions influence us before, during, and after a decision in made. The will is all-important in whether we engage in decision-making and whether we will actually follow through once a decision is made. Because the soul has such a pivotal role in making hard choices, we need to be able to care for it during and following the decision-making process.
It is generally believed that the soul is most effective in stillness. The ancients taught the need for stepping back and disconnecting from the angst and uncertainty in life through meditation. They understood that the emotions that flowed out of the soul could interfere with the mind and prevent it from effectively using reason, especially when the stakes were high. While I believe this to be true, it is only part of story. In difficult times, the stillness can serve as a deep reservoir of energy that we can use to get the mind through the decision-making process. It also provides the initial energy we need to take those first steps after the decision has been made.
Hard choices can trigger powerful emotions and challenge us to deal with them. We must learn to transform our anger into resolve, bitterness into courage, and revenge into purposefulness. Raw emotions simply appear. We have no control over their appearing or their intensity. They are like a pain in the body. They flare up and burn with a power that rises from the hidden depths of our humanity. They serve as signals that something is not right. They put us on alert that we need to pay attention to something that is out of kilter in our life. We can, however, control how we respond to these flares of emotion.
Painful emotions give us the energy we need to address the needs confronting us in the difficult decision. These emotions can “rev up” the mind to a deeper purpose than simple survival. They can give us the courage we need to look beyond our well-worn paths. They can bolster our resolve to face the challenges ahead. This same resolve will serve us well when the decision is made, and we face a difficult time of implementation. But we must first learn to still the waters within and allow the energy to accumulate without wasting it on flailing around in useless blaming, hand-wringing, and lashing out.
Our task in self-care for the soul is learning to maintain a stillness within even in the midst of the storm. Our task is to learn to discipline our will to withstand the soul storms.
Our soul is an important player in our decision-making. The soul includes both emotions and the will to act. These emotions influence us before, during, and after a decision in made. The will is all-important in whether we engage in decision-making and whether we will actually follow through once a decision is made. Because the soul has such a pivotal role in making hard choices, we need to be able to care for it during and following the decision-making process.
It is generally believed that the soul is most effective in stillness. The ancients taught the need for stepping back and disconnecting from the angst and uncertainty in life through meditation. They understood that the emotions that flowed out of the soul could interfere with the mind and prevent it from effectively using reason, especially when the stakes were high. While I believe this to be true, it is only part of story. In difficult times, the stillness can serve as a deep reservoir of energy that we can use to get the mind through the decision-making process. It also provides the initial energy we need to take those first steps after the decision has been made.
Hard choices can trigger powerful emotions and challenge us to deal with them. We must learn to transform our anger into resolve, bitterness into courage, and revenge into purposefulness. Raw emotions simply appear. We have no control over their appearing or their intensity. They are like a pain in the body. They flare up and burn with a power that rises from the hidden depths of our humanity. They serve as signals that something is not right. They put us on alert that we need to pay attention to something that is out of kilter in our life. We can, however, control how we respond to these flares of emotion.
Painful emotions give us the energy we need to address the needs confronting us in the difficult decision. These emotions can “rev up” the mind to a deeper purpose than simple survival. They can give us the courage we need to look beyond our well-worn paths. They can bolster our resolve to face the challenges ahead. This same resolve will serve us well when the decision is made, and we face a difficult time of implementation. But we must first learn to still the waters within and allow the energy to accumulate without wasting it on flailing around in useless blaming, hand-wringing, and lashing out.
Our task in self-care for the soul is learning to maintain a stillness within even in the midst of the storm. Our task is to learn to discipline our will to withstand the soul storms.
Tip
How can we fill that reservoir in the stillness of the soul?
First, we must not take the challenge personally. We cannot make more of the decision than it deserves. It is not an ultimate battle. Nor will it be our last battle. Step back when you feel the reservoir being emptied by anger, blaming, and flailing. Take one day at a time, nothing more, nothing less. Be patient with the process.
Second, allow the energy to accumulate in the still pool of the self. Do not waste it. If you feel you have a bubbling cauldron of emotion threatening to erupt, spend some time in calm reflection. Cool down the emotion by taking a break or engaging in a meditative practice that works for you. Your soul is a vast reservoir of willpower that we can control and use to fulfill the goals that grow out of our decision-making.
Third, allow the energy to empower, not overwhelm, you. A steam engine runs on small releases of energy contained in a chamber and then transferred to the wheels. Allow the energy to escape in a managed and meaningful way. Measure out your energy and make sure you have enough to get you over the hill.
As I suggested above, a primary way to do accomplish all of this is to maintain an inner stillness. Meditation can allow you to bring calm to the cauldron without dissipating the energy. Step-back. Breathe. Stay present to your yourself. When the calm has been restored, rise and move forward with the process and implementation.
Use the energy generated by your emotions but keep your hand on the throttle.
First, we must not take the challenge personally. We cannot make more of the decision than it deserves. It is not an ultimate battle. Nor will it be our last battle. Step back when you feel the reservoir being emptied by anger, blaming, and flailing. Take one day at a time, nothing more, nothing less. Be patient with the process.
Second, allow the energy to accumulate in the still pool of the self. Do not waste it. If you feel you have a bubbling cauldron of emotion threatening to erupt, spend some time in calm reflection. Cool down the emotion by taking a break or engaging in a meditative practice that works for you. Your soul is a vast reservoir of willpower that we can control and use to fulfill the goals that grow out of our decision-making.
Third, allow the energy to empower, not overwhelm, you. A steam engine runs on small releases of energy contained in a chamber and then transferred to the wheels. Allow the energy to escape in a managed and meaningful way. Measure out your energy and make sure you have enough to get you over the hill.
As I suggested above, a primary way to do accomplish all of this is to maintain an inner stillness. Meditation can allow you to bring calm to the cauldron without dissipating the energy. Step-back. Breathe. Stay present to your yourself. When the calm has been restored, rise and move forward with the process and implementation.
Use the energy generated by your emotions but keep your hand on the throttle.
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