The assignment is due first thing in the morning. You have got every problem worked out but one. But the more you look at it the less sense it makes?
You have tried every diet you have ever seen and you have not lost any real weight.
You have done your best getting to know your co-worker. You have shared coffee, lunch, and even a quick drink after work. You have listened and honestly shared. You know the success of the project depends on working with this person. But you still cringe every time they walk into your office.
These are just three not uncommon examples of stuckness. Being stuck means we are at our wits end on how to move ahead. No matter what we do, nothing changes for the good. We may be in despair but we can see it coming on the next truck. Being stuck is a bundle of feelings and experiences that hits everybody from time to time.
Stuckness has a lot in common with its root verb, stick, i.e. stick like glue. This verb talks about adhering to something, being unyielding in attaching to someone or something. Sticking to something implies that we are sticking to something intentionally. But being stuck has a whole different feel. We are adhering to or being adhered to involuntarily. Stuckness means we are trapped, incapable of freeing our self from a situation. It happens more often than we may be aware.
We do not have to recognize that we are stuck in order to be stuck. There are situations that creep up on us in such a way that we simply accept it as “the way things are.” We may not enjoy them but changing them would be more difficult than accommodating to and living with the stuckness. It may be a marriage that is held together by convenience rather than love. It could be a job that pays the bills but it no longer makes our heart sing. It. It may be the result of being told we would never be able to sing as a child and 50 years later we have given up even singing in the shower. Stuckness is far more common than most of us recognize or are willing to accept.
Stuckness challenges our sense of autonomy, the freedom to act for ourselves. It suggests that we are bound by circumstances beyond our control. It may create a uncomfortable sense of dependency on others or foster a feeling of vulnerability. It may even erode our natural optimism and hope about our future. Stuckness comes to us and may become permanent residents of our internal conversation within ourselves and the world around us.
How do we know we are stuck? It is often self-evident when we feel frustrated or challenged with the circumstances in our life. But it can reveal itself when we find ourselves in the “Same old, Same old” where very little changes and we are accepting even if we half-heartedly resist it from time to time.
Over the next few weeks I will be exploring ways that we can take care of ourselves when we find ourselves stuck in a slow moving eddy when we would rather be challenging the rapids. I look forward to this journey with you.
TIP

If you need a little reminder to help you focus, I offer you this gift. Print it out or save it to your phone. it will help you relax and Breathe. Download the picture.