General Information
Physical change is an inevitable part of the human experience. There is no staying as we are. The situations are also constantly changing around us. Financial, social, and relational factors are always shifting this way and that. We have limited control and cannot see very far into the future. Such change provides a constant challenge. How can we take care of ourselves when we face significant changes in our health, our financial, or physical situation?
If we follow the wisdom of the Serenity Prayer, we have several options for self-care.
First, we can accept what we cannot change. If we have no control over a change that is affecting our daily living then we need to come to terms with it and reframe our abilities and resources. “Coming to terms” begins with acknowledging that we have no control over the change itself. A sudden economic reversal like losing a job or an investment is beyond our control. We can continue to live as if it did not happen, denial, but that will not change the situation. By accepting the change, we will be able to take a fresh look at where we are, what we have, and discern our options for the future. This reframing, looking anew and seeing with new eyes, frees us from the anger, shock and fear of the change. We are free to move on.
However, there are those occasional changes that we can resist and, perhaps reverse. Here we must change what we can. We need to explore ways to address the changes such as through medical care, financial planning, or other self-care. One of the most basic ways to can change the course of our physical health is through routine medical care. We all age, but that does not mean we have an established appointment with death. Regular check-ups, routine exams, and medications have extended the human lifespan dramatically. The same can be said for financial and social changes in our lives. By paying attention, consulting those who can help, and then following through on the basics for self-care, we can address some changes in our lives. We will not live forever, but we will live happier and healthier lives. It is a choice. Live or allow avoidable change to drain our joy and hope.
Lastly, we need to be able to tell the difference between the inevitable and the challenge of the moment. How can you tell? Frankly, sometimes we can’t. This a situation families face when considering hospice care. Generally, they try everything they can to change the decline of their family member. But there comes a moment when they realize that all their efforts are causing more harm than good. When the odds are that the care will not change the course of the situation, we can know with a deeper understanding than mere evidence. Wisdom will tell us that it is time to accept the change. Wisdom allows us to accept the inevitable.
As we all have experienced, trouble comes when we try to change the inevitable and accept that which can be changed. When wisdom tells us, “It is time” we can and must shift into acceptance.
If we follow the wisdom of the Serenity Prayer, we have several options for self-care.
First, we can accept what we cannot change. If we have no control over a change that is affecting our daily living then we need to come to terms with it and reframe our abilities and resources. “Coming to terms” begins with acknowledging that we have no control over the change itself. A sudden economic reversal like losing a job or an investment is beyond our control. We can continue to live as if it did not happen, denial, but that will not change the situation. By accepting the change, we will be able to take a fresh look at where we are, what we have, and discern our options for the future. This reframing, looking anew and seeing with new eyes, frees us from the anger, shock and fear of the change. We are free to move on.
However, there are those occasional changes that we can resist and, perhaps reverse. Here we must change what we can. We need to explore ways to address the changes such as through medical care, financial planning, or other self-care. One of the most basic ways to can change the course of our physical health is through routine medical care. We all age, but that does not mean we have an established appointment with death. Regular check-ups, routine exams, and medications have extended the human lifespan dramatically. The same can be said for financial and social changes in our lives. By paying attention, consulting those who can help, and then following through on the basics for self-care, we can address some changes in our lives. We will not live forever, but we will live happier and healthier lives. It is a choice. Live or allow avoidable change to drain our joy and hope.
Lastly, we need to be able to tell the difference between the inevitable and the challenge of the moment. How can you tell? Frankly, sometimes we can’t. This a situation families face when considering hospice care. Generally, they try everything they can to change the decline of their family member. But there comes a moment when they realize that all their efforts are causing more harm than good. When the odds are that the care will not change the course of the situation, we can know with a deeper understanding than mere evidence. Wisdom will tell us that it is time to accept the change. Wisdom allows us to accept the inevitable.
As we all have experienced, trouble comes when we try to change the inevitable and accept that which can be changed. When wisdom tells us, “It is time” we can and must shift into acceptance.
Tips
Make a list of the changes you are facing. Talk with your family or friends about them. Use their wisdom to help you decide whether they are inevitable or can be changed. Look for options that have a reasonable chance of changing the course of the change you are facing. Seek outside advice, i.e. your doctor, financial advisor, or other experts. Ask them for their opinion and weigh those options against your own judgment and intuition. Finally, sit quietly with the options before you and allow them to speak directly to you.
Draw up a plan for both accepting the inevitable and making changes to address the challenges for the not so inevitable. Be as specific as you can. Set short-term and long-term goals for yourself.
Finally give a copy of this plan to a close family member or friend who will help you be accountable for seeing it through. Allow them to help you stay on track. Do not be afraid to change the plan if the challenge becomes impossible. Sit back and revisit the process above and make a new plan.
Physical changes may be inevitable, but they do not have to steal our peace of mind or soul. These changes may shorten our days, but do not let them take away from our life today. Let wisdom guide you and you will find life even in the midst of physical changes.
Draw up a plan for both accepting the inevitable and making changes to address the challenges for the not so inevitable. Be as specific as you can. Set short-term and long-term goals for yourself.
Finally give a copy of this plan to a close family member or friend who will help you be accountable for seeing it through. Allow them to help you stay on track. Do not be afraid to change the plan if the challenge becomes impossible. Sit back and revisit the process above and make a new plan.
Physical changes may be inevitable, but they do not have to steal our peace of mind or soul. These changes may shorten our days, but do not let them take away from our life today. Let wisdom guide you and you will find life even in the midst of physical changes.
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