Victor Frankl was an Austrian Neurologist and Psychiatrist who was interned in Dachau during WWII. He lost his Mother and Brother in Auschwitz and his Wife in Bergen-Belsen. A keen observer of humanity, Frankl noticed that people responded to life in the Prison camps differently. Some gave up while others did their best to survive. From his own experience, he found that people who could answer the “why” of their lives found a way to survive. Those whose lives were empty of meaning did not survive. Many died of emptiness and despair.
His work highlights the role that meaning has in our lives. The well-lived life has a purpose, a reason to get out of bed each morning. We may get out of bed to feed and care for our family. We may have a career or professional life to pursue. We may find meaning and purpose in being a craftsman or artist. We may rise to make our parents proud, or serve God, or build a better mousetrap. These are not simply goals, they are life-long callings that help us piece together a lifetime.
Meaning allows us to tie our story together. It helps us make sense out of the flotsam and jetsam of living. It makes crammed calendars, sleepless nights, or endless meetings bearable. If we can answer the “Why” question we are able to relax and enjoy the journey.
When we lose meaning in our lives, we become disconnected from our mind, the seat of memory and reasoning. Each of us has moments when the “why” doesn’t exist. Have you ever tried to put together a 2,000-piece jigsaw puzzle without a picture? The pieces are all there but we do not know how they fit together. We may have a general idea (a mountain scene) but beyond that, we are lost in the pieces scattered before us. We may become filled with frustration and confusion. Memory and reasoning are impaired.
Meaninglessness makes pain more distressing. A meaningless struggle is more difficult to fight. A meaningless task takes more energy to complete. Meaninglessness can lead us to give up and slip beneath the waves because there is no point in treading water any longer.
The disconnect between ourselves and our mind caused by meaninglessness can be reversed. The key is in re-discovering meaning for our lives. We can do so by finding the picture that will help us put the puzzle back together. That picture is the mental image of who we are, our purpose for living.
TIP -- Writing your Eulogy
Take a few minutes to relax. Take a few deep breaths and perhaps a glass of wine.
Write your own eulogy. Be sure and include where you are from, your family, your education, and significant experiences. Then include your accomplishments as well as your hopes and dreams and how they might have changed over the years. A list of people and experiences for whom you are grateful may be included next. Finally, close the eulogy with statements that describe how you want to be remembered by your family, your friends, your co-workers, and your community.
Set this aside for a couple of days and then come back to it from time to time. Make changes as they feel appropriate. In doing so, you will keep the “picture” of yourself on the table as you piece together a life with meaning and purpose.