“You have to accept the consequences of your actions.”
Whenever we heard these words as children, they were seldom the result of our making a good choice. They usually followed a very bad choice that had negative results for ourselves or others. They generally came before some sort of punishment that was intended to increase the discomfort of the negative consequences themselves. Being held accountable and responsible for our actions was never a good thing when we were children.
But we were lucky if we had parents who helped us accept responsibility for our choices even though we probably did not always appreciate their efforts. Bring held responsible for our choices is not a negative experience for the “grown up.” It can have one of several positive outcomes for the “woke” person.
We can celebrate well-made choices. It feels good to know that you made the right choice in a difficult situation. It confirms our positive self-image and encourages us to look back and see what went right. It offers a good dose of energy as we move into our next opportunity to choose.
We can also celebrate the opportunity to learn from less than good choices. Having a negative consequence can also offer a bounty to our lives. Once we acknowledge the disappointment, the fall-out from a bad choice offers us the gift of insight. We can look back and see if we based our choice on bad information, misreading the situation, relying on unreliable circumstances, or simply screwing up. Perhaps we just did the right thing at the wrong time. A bad choice allows us to learn from the best teacher of all, life itself. But this only works if we are grown-up and not trapped in self-justification and ego-satisfaction. But the grown up can celebrate a bad choice as an opportunity to move forward with greater insight and understanding.
We also learn to live and appreciate that others struggle with in their choices and sometimes make poor decisions. By having failed we can become less judgmental about other’s bad choices. Again, this does not work for the man-child or woman-child. They are unable to acknowledge their responsibility and thus see themselves as always making the right decision. They have no empathy for others who come up short in life. But for those who are grown up, our own struggles make us sensitive to the struggles of others and able to encourage others to learn from their mistakes and bad choices. Adults celebrate the gift of empathy that comes with bad choices.
Finally, the grown up who makes bad choices can find themselves in good company and on common ground with others who struggle to be responsible. We can find companions who can help us grow through the difficulty and embrace life as something more than “winning.” We will find that we are surrounded by a great host with whom we can find love and trust, joy and hope even when we fall short of our own expectations
Therefore, I encourage you to celebrate the responsibility that allows us to claim our choices and grow through even those that may bring pain or heartache. If such celebration is difficult or impossible for you, recognize that you may have some growing to do. Seek out a spiritual companion who can help you “wake up to yourself.”
Have a Blessed and Happy Thanksgiving!
Bob
But we were lucky if we had parents who helped us accept responsibility for our choices even though we probably did not always appreciate their efforts. Bring held responsible for our choices is not a negative experience for the “grown up.” It can have one of several positive outcomes for the “woke” person.
We can celebrate well-made choices. It feels good to know that you made the right choice in a difficult situation. It confirms our positive self-image and encourages us to look back and see what went right. It offers a good dose of energy as we move into our next opportunity to choose.
We can also celebrate the opportunity to learn from less than good choices. Having a negative consequence can also offer a bounty to our lives. Once we acknowledge the disappointment, the fall-out from a bad choice offers us the gift of insight. We can look back and see if we based our choice on bad information, misreading the situation, relying on unreliable circumstances, or simply screwing up. Perhaps we just did the right thing at the wrong time. A bad choice allows us to learn from the best teacher of all, life itself. But this only works if we are grown-up and not trapped in self-justification and ego-satisfaction. But the grown up can celebrate a bad choice as an opportunity to move forward with greater insight and understanding.
We also learn to live and appreciate that others struggle with in their choices and sometimes make poor decisions. By having failed we can become less judgmental about other’s bad choices. Again, this does not work for the man-child or woman-child. They are unable to acknowledge their responsibility and thus see themselves as always making the right decision. They have no empathy for others who come up short in life. But for those who are grown up, our own struggles make us sensitive to the struggles of others and able to encourage others to learn from their mistakes and bad choices. Adults celebrate the gift of empathy that comes with bad choices.
Finally, the grown up who makes bad choices can find themselves in good company and on common ground with others who struggle to be responsible. We can find companions who can help us grow through the difficulty and embrace life as something more than “winning.” We will find that we are surrounded by a great host with whom we can find love and trust, joy and hope even when we fall short of our own expectations
Therefore, I encourage you to celebrate the responsibility that allows us to claim our choices and grow through even those that may bring pain or heartache. If such celebration is difficult or impossible for you, recognize that you may have some growing to do. Seek out a spiritual companion who can help you “wake up to yourself.”
Have a Blessed and Happy Thanksgiving!
Bob
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