Taking care of ourselves when we are out and about among our friends and enemies can be quite difficult. We all have buttons that can be pushed and people who know where they are. We all carry around painful memories that can bubble up with explosive force on those around us. We have all found ourselves being manipulated into making a bad decision by people who may not have our best interest at heart. Protecting ourselves and developing healthy and meaningful relationships is the goal for Self-Care among our friends and enemies.
In the last few weeks I have discussed ways to accomplish this with the face-to-face relationships as well as the relationships that we carry around in our heart and soul. As I close this series, I want to consider the importance of taking care of ourselves in our online relationships.
I do not have space or the expertise to say all we need to know about online safety. But I do want to share some thoughts for you to consider that can help you take care of yourself online.
It is difficult to discern who our friends and enemies might be. It is incredibly easy to deceive someone online. We have a very limited view of the other person and much of that view is under their control. It is important that we are comfortable knowing who we are dealing with and avoid sharing personal information with people we do not know or cannot trust.
We may have a much broader range of contact via friends and friends of friends as well as strangers who prowl the net. Once we put something on the social media, we have essentially lost control of it. Even privacy policies cannot protect you from someone copying and posting your words. If we find it difficult to know our online friends and enemies, imagine the vast number of strangers out there who could gain access to your online presence. In short, avoid posting anything that could place you or your family and friends in danger.
We may suffer from the Illusion of safety of physical distance. Online presence offers the illusion of anonymity and distance. We may say and do things online that we would never do to a person’s face. We can hurt other people by what we say from our “online” distance. Carefully process your posts before you hit the “send” button to ensure that you are not pretending to hide behind a non-existent wall.
Unfortunately, many people are tempted to abandon net relationships all together and believe that they are safe. First of all, once it is posted, it may never die. Shutting down your accounts will not erase any information you have already shared. Further, if you enjoy the relationships you have with the people in your online network, you will likely lose that support when you go offline. Self-care is not as easy as signing off everything.
For these and many, many other reasons, we need to accept that we are responsible for managing our relationships with friends and enemies (and strangers) online. We can use many of the ideas I have shared in previous posts. There are other resources available to help you take care of yourself online. I have posted a few in the FYI section. But none of these will help if we do not accept responsibility for our relationships, online and otherwise. Do they enhance your well-being? Do they add unnecessary stress or worry to your life? Do they help you grow or prevent you from reaching beyond the moment? These are personal decisions that each of us will have to make. There are no “one size, fits all” solutions or easy “cliched” short-cuts.
Take good care of yourself in all of your relationships. Each relationship can enrich your life in unimaginable ways.
Blessings,
Bob
In the last few weeks I have discussed ways to accomplish this with the face-to-face relationships as well as the relationships that we carry around in our heart and soul. As I close this series, I want to consider the importance of taking care of ourselves in our online relationships.
I do not have space or the expertise to say all we need to know about online safety. But I do want to share some thoughts for you to consider that can help you take care of yourself online.
It is difficult to discern who our friends and enemies might be. It is incredibly easy to deceive someone online. We have a very limited view of the other person and much of that view is under their control. It is important that we are comfortable knowing who we are dealing with and avoid sharing personal information with people we do not know or cannot trust.
We may have a much broader range of contact via friends and friends of friends as well as strangers who prowl the net. Once we put something on the social media, we have essentially lost control of it. Even privacy policies cannot protect you from someone copying and posting your words. If we find it difficult to know our online friends and enemies, imagine the vast number of strangers out there who could gain access to your online presence. In short, avoid posting anything that could place you or your family and friends in danger.
We may suffer from the Illusion of safety of physical distance. Online presence offers the illusion of anonymity and distance. We may say and do things online that we would never do to a person’s face. We can hurt other people by what we say from our “online” distance. Carefully process your posts before you hit the “send” button to ensure that you are not pretending to hide behind a non-existent wall.
Unfortunately, many people are tempted to abandon net relationships all together and believe that they are safe. First of all, once it is posted, it may never die. Shutting down your accounts will not erase any information you have already shared. Further, if you enjoy the relationships you have with the people in your online network, you will likely lose that support when you go offline. Self-care is not as easy as signing off everything.
For these and many, many other reasons, we need to accept that we are responsible for managing our relationships with friends and enemies (and strangers) online. We can use many of the ideas I have shared in previous posts. There are other resources available to help you take care of yourself online. I have posted a few in the FYI section. But none of these will help if we do not accept responsibility for our relationships, online and otherwise. Do they enhance your well-being? Do they add unnecessary stress or worry to your life? Do they help you grow or prevent you from reaching beyond the moment? These are personal decisions that each of us will have to make. There are no “one size, fits all” solutions or easy “cliched” short-cuts.
Take good care of yourself in all of your relationships. Each relationship can enrich your life in unimaginable ways.
Blessings,
Bob
RSS Feed